Mistakes are Opportunities to Learn

Question:
It is only today that I’ve discovered your website, a day after my husband and I have already told our 11 year old son that as a consequence to two pretty severe behavioral issues, he was not going to be able to participate in an upcoming motorcycle race, or to sleep over at a friends’ house for Halloween. I am now realizing after scouring your website, that taking away privileges, isn’t the best method; and we certainly didn’t agree in advance what limits would be set, and what would happen. My concern however, is that if we don’t follow through with the “punishment” that has been set, that we will have totally missed an opportunity to impart the seriousness of his behavior, and our ability to stick to our plan. Help? Olivia